Ready to break free of over-functioning and codependency?
Nicole Burgess is a Soul-Led Leadership Coach for women in midlife who are ready to go from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and performing to compassion, confidence, and connection.
You can have ME-aning and fulfillment in your life without jumping into other people’s lanes!
In this episode: Codependency
- Sign up for updates on a new group coaching program for women in midlife feeling unfulfilled and wondering what is missing (email: podcast (at) nicoleburgesscoaching (dot) com)
- Under and Over functioning by Harriet Lerner
- Melody Beattie’s definition of codependency
- Robert Subby’s definition
- Where their behaviors stem from
- Perfectionism Series (ep 72, 73, and 74)
- Nicole gives an example of overly anxious parents
- Low self-esteem is often associated with codependency
- Examples of codependency behaviors
- External vs internal locus of control
- Have poor boundaries
- Feeling your anger ( Episode 122 Three Benefits of anger)
- Remembering you are an intelligent, resourceful, and an action taking woman
- Nicole shares friends struggle with over-functioning
- Example of a family intentionally creating chaos
- What is the drama triangle
- How this behavior can impact your professional life
- Good girl persona (Episode 2)
- Self-forgiveness and leaning into the unknown
- What am I feeling?
- What do I want in this relationship or from a specific event?
- Begin to assert your needs and wants
- State your truth
- You are not responsible FOR other people’s emotions and behavior
- Create a self-care plan
- Can show compassion and concern without rescuing
- Accept the reality of the moment
- Signs where you are not using boundaries (episode 12 boundaries; episode 51 looking for permission)
- No longer living in self-preservation mode and live your life
- Not being reactionary or lack of any reaction
- Managing your energy
Action steps:
- Where do you feel like you are out of control in your life?
- Who or what events do you try to control?
- What is one action step you can begin this week to change that?
- Write down any of the codependent behaviors resonated with you
Resources Mentioned:
*Disclaimer-Some of these links are affiliate links which means I receive a small portion of the sales. This helps me continue to produce this free podcast for you.
Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melody Beattie